Politics

Washington, D.C. —After months of deteriorating relations, President Clinton yesterday announced that the U.S. has broken off talks with Carpetland and its friendly, helpful team…

WASHINGTON, D.C.—In an impressive act of imagination, President Clinton used the power of make-believe Sunday to turn an ordinary bar of soap into a fun,…

PLAINFIELD, NE—In an inspiring display of modern-day heroism, Plainfield fireman James Pagnozzi yesterday saved the life of area resident Janie Siles, 4, who became caught…

WASHINGTON (AP)—A unilateral caucus of the nation’s law enforcement officials yesterday unveiled America’s new food-crime equivalency ratings for 1996 .

WASHINGTON, DC—Calling themselves “insulting caricatures born of bigotry” and “demeaning portrayals bearing no resemblance to actual human beings or cultures,” an estimated 400,000 so-called jigaboos,…

by Delicious Flavor of Trident Gum

WASHINGTON, D.C.—In an incident under heavy investigation by Secret Service officials, President Clinton was “tagged” late yesterday afternoon, spray-painted across the chest by a member…

The federal government shut down again on Monday at 5 p.m. when a bat was spotted flying around the inside of the U.S. Capitol building.…

A delegation representing a broad range of Native American governments converged on Washington, D.C., today, presenting a prepared statement before Congress. The statement, described as…