Immigration

News

Homeland Security Relaxes Species Requirements To Join ICE

WASHINGTON—In an effort to expand recruitment for President Donald Trump’s immigration crackdown, the Department of Homeland Security announced Tuesday that it would waive the species…
American Voices

New Rules Would Deny Visas To Those With Chronic Health Conditions

The U.S. government issued new guidance that would deny visas to applicants with certain chronic health conditions such as diabetes or obesity if they may…
Local

Woman Trying To Find Nonpolitical Way To Say Her Cleaner Was Deported

CHICAGO—Struggling to explain the recent development during a polite conversation at her neighbor’s house, local woman Sarah Walker reportedly tried Tuesday to find a nonpolitical…
Politics

DHS: ‘Daycare Workers Have Walked Freely in This Country For Far Too Long’

WASHINGTON—Reaffirming the Trump administration’s promise to crack down on individuals providing supervision and instruction to youngsters across the United States, Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem…
News

All 6 Branches Of Armed Forces Present At Arrest Of Undocumented Nanny

BLOOMFIELD HILLS, MI—In what they described as a collaborative effort to share resources and information in defense of U.S. territory, Pentagon officials confirmed Monday that…
Local

Parents Ask Detained Nanny If She’s Still Free To Watch Kids Friday

CHICAGO—Hoping to lock down childcare so they could get out of the house for a fun date night this week, area parents Mitchell and Jessica…

Politics

Kristi Noem Looms In Background During Entire Episode Of ‘90 Day Fiancé’

WASHINGTON—Describing the secretary of homeland security’s cameo on the reality show as “highly unnerving,” viewers reported Friday that Kristi Noem can be seen looming in…
News

ICE Confirms Agents Do Not Have Faces Beneath Masks

WASHINGTON—In response to legislation that would ban officers from obscuring their identities during arrests and raids, U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement confirmed Thursday that beneath…
American Voices

Trump Adds $100,000 Fee For H-1B Visa Applications

In an attempt to reduce foreign labor in the tech sector, President Trump imposed a $100,000 annual fee on new H-1B visa applications, dealing a…
American Voices

State Department Threatens Immigrants Who Mock Charlie Kirk’s Death

The U.S. State Department said it may review the legal status of immigrants who “praise, rationalize, or make light” of Charlie Kirk’s fatal shooting. What…
News

Pros And Cons Of Deploying Troops To Chicago

Chicagoans are waiting tensely to see whether President Donald Trump will follow through on his threat to deploy the National Guard. The Onion examines the…
News

U.S. Citizenship Test To Include 4-Year Imprisonment Section

WASHINGTON—Stating that the country’s naturalization process was “highly outdated,” White House officials announced Thursday that the U.S. citizenship test would now include a four-year imprisonment…