Alex Warren’s “Ordinary” has held the number one spot on the Billboard Hot 100 for the ninth week in a row. The Onion shares everything you need to know about Warren.
Genre: Music for 19-year-olds to get married to
Religious Affiliation: Checks out
Instruments: Guitar, ring light
Hype House Chore: Vape organizer
Years Active: Yesterday–Present
Audience: Christian Starbucks rewards members
Dream Collaborator: High school graduation slideshow
Beard: In progress
