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Vol 48: Issue 49

Commentary, Opinion

I Get To Determine Whether Gay People Can Marry

Last week, the Supreme Court decided to take up a pair of cases related to gay marriage, cases that will for the first time determine…
Politics

Boehner Just Wants Wife To Listen, Not Come Up With Alternative Debt-Reduction Ideas

WASHINGTON—Amid the continuing debate over the upcoming “fiscal cliff,” sources close to House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH) confirmed Monday that he simply wants his wife,…
Entertainment

The Week In Pictures
Featurette, Local

Chad Greene and Danielle Faye

Chad Greene and Danielle Faye were married before friends and family this weekend, but as of press time it was not known if the ceremony…
Entertainment

Sesame Street

PBS
News, News In Photos

Tokyo Adds 100-Story Toadstool To Skyline

News, News In Photos

Supreme Court To Hear Cases Determining Whether Human Beings Deserve Equal Rights
American Voices, Opinion

Pot, Gay Marriage Now Legal In Washington

Same-sex marriage licenses became available in Washington state yesterday at 12:01 a.m., and at the same time, a voter-backed law decriminalizing the recreational use of…
News

Chris Christie Dreaming About 72-Inch Springsteen Sub

TRENTON, NJ—Slowly licking his lips and salivating as he indulged his imagination, New Jersey governor Chris Christie reportedly spent most of Friday afternoon alone in…
News

New Study Finds Primitive Customers Capable Of Buying Tools From Hardware Store

PHILADELPHIA—A new study published Friday by scientists at the University of Pennsylvania found that under certain conditions, even the most primitive of shoppers possessed the…
Local

Area Family Has No Idea Where Dad Gets Shirts

SHERIDAN, WY—Saying he must get them somehow but that his means of procurement remained a mystery, the children of area father Don Griffith, 42, confirmed…
Entertainment, Magazine

Why I Serve Nude: The First Totally Naked Marine Shares His Thoughts On Fighting In Afghanistan

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