Football

TAMPA, FL—Following his team’s divisional-round playoff loss to the Los Angeles Rams, Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Tom Brady reportedly ripped into his nutritional supplements Tuesday…

TENNESSEE—Deepening the ties between the two institutions, a new partnership between the NFL and the U.S. military unveiled Saturday would send the first 1,000 fans…

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—Throwing the flag during the annual Army-Navy game after the clearing smoke revealed an obvious illegal hit, Army’s football team received a 15-yard…

SEATTLE—Telling reporters that he had never seen a play drawn up like that before, Seattle Seahawks center Kyle Fuller admitted his confusion Sunday over a…

MADISON, NJ—Wildly celebrating after the line held its ground on a 3rd and 2, centrist NFL fan Brian Ducklo reportedly spent all day Sunday rooting…

FOXBOROUGH, MA—Slamming the rookie’s success as a fluke of organizational competence, critics claimed Tuesday that Patriots quarterback Mac Jones was just the product of being…

NOVI, MI—Carefully scrutinizing the athletes lining up before the national anthem, Detroit Lions fan Greg Burnett was reportedly praying Thursday that the players start protesting…

NEW YORK—Calling the discovery an encouraging breakthrough in treating serious CTE, a new study commissioned by the NFL and released Tuesday found that concussion symptoms…

INDIANAPOLIS—Cursing as yet another call interrupted a fade route to T.Y. Hilton, Colts quarterback Carson Wentz confirmed Sunday that his helmet radio won’t stop ringing…

NEW ORLEANS—Looking to the distant future for the hope he felt he could not find today, Saints quarterback Jameis Winston opted Thursday to cryogenically freeze…

NEW YORK—Noting that time was running out, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell warned Deshaun Watson’s accusers Wednesday that they only have until the stroke of midnight…

BOSTON—Taking an important step forward in understanding the long-term damage caused by being tackled and spiked, NFL scientists studied the effects of CTE Tuesday by…

WAUKESHA, WI—Hailing the massive specimen as the greatest NFL discovery of the century, league scientists announced Tuesday that they have discovered a perfectly preserved fourth…

JACKSONVILLE, FL—Apologizing to Jaguars fans for his early failures in leading the team, Jacksonville coach Urban Meyer admitted to reporters Tuesday that he is still…

BRONXVILLE, NY—Suggesting such a massive leap forward could have grave consequences for the league and humanity, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell told reporters Tuesday that he…

DALLAS—Alleging that the Dallas Cowboys quarterback deliberately flouted Texas abortion laws, state troopers arrested Dak Prescott on the field Sunday for terminating a conceived play…